I’m not sure I can say much about this post. It’s creepy. Maybe too creepy? Should I have used an older Donnie and April? Are the “young” 2012 Don and April too young? What is too young? What’s the age of consent in New York?

These are questions no one should ask.

There are a lot of moving pieces at play here, so bear with me:

1. Facebook. I hate 90% of the content people put on Facebook. I don’t hate it in the way that people hate onions, or Mondays. No, I truly loathe knowing you on Facebook. Your vague status updates, you bitching about your co-workers, or that guy who cut you off in traffic. Still, for all of my hate, I love Facebook. Maybe I’m just in an abusive relationship with it. Maybe it’s my Bobby Brown.

2. Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. Yeah, I freaking love the Ninja Turtles. I especially love the new Nickelodeon series. I have to admit when I saw the art released before the series aired, I was pretty skeptical. After half a season, I’m totally sold. My three kids, wife and I hunker down once a week and stare at the TV silently absorbing the new series. It’s awesome. There is enough slapstick to keep my kids happy and a few jokes that sail over their heads just for me. From the modernized-throwback theme to the speech pattern of The Krang, it’s great.

3. One Million Whatevers. Listen, if we aren’t talking about money, one million anythings is too many. So please, shut the fuck up already.

Heroes in a half shell,